Hungy for Haikyo!

Our annual pilgrimage just took off the other day. We visited churches in Tarlac and Pangasinan. I am meaning to blog about it and I hope to God that I get the focus and discipline to actually do it within the Lenten season, but first, I am excited to share my little side trip while on a pilgrimage. Actually, now that I think about it, I feel a little guilty about skipping a prayer and reflection session because ruins of an old church got me distracted.

It happened on our second stop,  St. Michael the Archangel Parish in Camiling, Tarlac. When I learned from the marker that the present church we were visiting is a replacement to the old one that burned in 1997, I immediately wondered what happened to the old church. This is the current St. Michael the Archangel Parish church.

While our parish priest was telling us to settle down, I felt the need to pee so I went out to look for the toilet. While walking, I realized the old church was literally just a stone's throw away from the present church as I stumbled upon its ruins. Then I got excited and forgot about the state of my urinary bladder. I immediately jumped in the first opening I saw.

The facade of the church is still intact and has its old grandeur, but there's really not much to see inside, still I indulged in capturing my first Haikyo exploration.

view from the Altar spot

view from the choir loft

I imagine this is where the portrait of the four evangelists were

the stained glass

the main door

There's something poignant and appealing about the decay of deserted spaces, it makes me think about the "how was" and "what ifs". The way nature reclaims a concrete structure is a profoundly beautiful reminder that nothing in this world is permanent. You may have once been a massive evidence of this nation's colonial past, but today and the coming days, you will slowly dissipate into oblivion.

once a sacred structure is now tainted with a public service graffiti

I tried to research about the cause of the fire, but I couldn't find anything substantial. I wish I asked around, but I was out of time and confident that I'd find about it online. I learned that parishioners tried to rebuild and restore the old church, but their efforts were unsuccessful. Instead, a construction of a new church took place, financed by former Marcos crony and San Miguel Corporation chairman, Danding Cojuangco. I guess restoring the orginal church back to its old glory using present technology would be too costly.

This One's for You Don...

I am walking away from this room beaming with inspiration and at the same time, a heavy heart. Why, it all started with Twitter. I was looking at Jim Paredes' tweets, it brought me to his tumbler, then to an over a month old post about Dolores Hart's attendance to the Oscars last year. She looked familiar I thought. When I read on, I learned that she started in Elvis Presley's first Technicolor film, Loving You. So I remembered, I bought a DVD copy of the film for my parents (it was a clearance sale). I watched it, didn't really leave an impression, nothing remarkable, I thought. Anyway, the interesting part was,  after making a few films, Hart left Hollywood and became a nun. I found it interesting because she seemed to have a promising career, she was VERY beautiful (and still is), and she was engaged too. Yet she chose a secluded life exposed to hard labor and renounced comfort and luxury. Boy, that calling must have been crystal clear and very powerful too! 

Anyway, I am always drawn to inspiring stories like this, I wish to meet her and  more inspiring people whose lives are fueled by something greater than power and money, something we will definitely take in the afterlife. 

So here is the documentary film, God is the Bigger Elvis, about this amazing woman. It was nominated for Best Documentary Short at the 84th Academy Awards, where Dolores attended the ceremony, her first  Oscar attendance since 1959.

The heavy part of the documentary has something to do with her former fiance' - Don Robinson. Although he dated other women after the engagement broke off, he never got married. He admitted that he never got over Dolores, that he still love her at the time of the interview like he loved her more than four decades ago. He died in November 29, 2011. Throughout his life, he visited her during Christmas and Easter in the Benedictine Abbey of Regina Laudis  (Bethlehem, CT) and they remained close friends. He said that "every love doesn't have to wind up at the altar".

When I get to witness something so pure and profound, I could not help but shed tears of indescribable feeling. Perhaps it was because the theme of unrequited love is just too close to home.  I've known it too many times that it's impossible not to get pricked. 

When I contemplate on Don's side of the story, the song Eternally plays on my mind. So I shall end this post with this song and a promise, that one of these days, I will lightt a candle for him and pray for the repose of his soul. 

The Year in Politics

I don't want to say that Christmas is over. Here in the Philippines, it lasts until Epiphany (we also earned the reputation of having the longest celebration, which starts on September 1). But Christmas day had passed and during this time of the year, people start to look back on the things that transpired in preparation of the New Year.

Just this time, let's talk politics shall we? It's really not my passion to be political, but I do care about current issues, and I feel it's timely that I post my thoughts about 2 historic bills that passed this year. They deserve a space in my blog, after all, both bills lapsed more than a decade hurdle!

The first one is something that I care deeply is the passage of the Sin Tax Bill. Then just last week, President  Noynoy Aquino finally signed it, now it's officially a law. The new law aims to raise revenue from cigarettes and alcohol products, of course this would mean increase of their prices and hopefully it would discourage people, especially the youth, from consuming them. I feel that it's long overdue, but it's never too late, the law will take effect next year. Personally I'm not affected since I'm not a smoker and I rarely (almost never) drink spirited beverages anyway. But even if I do, I would still go for the passage of the bill to discourage people with lower income from consuming cigarettes and alcohol. Of course this bill comes with a disadvantage, naturally, regulation of sin products like this would mean an increase in smuggling. Even without the law, it's happening, smuggled products make their way here. I guess it's all up to the people at Customs (which happens to be one of the most corrupt department) to uphold a strict implementation on smuggling law. Another thing that some people brought up is the the displacement of tobacco farmers and vendors. I'm not really worried about that, part of the revenue to be raised by the law will go to programs that would provide alternative crops and jobs for the farmers. I've also read that some farmers are unfazed by the passage of the bill because they still have an international market (so shut up Bongbong Marcos!). So this is definitely something to look forward in 2013. I am confident that the objectives of Sin Tax Law will be met, hopefully sooner.

Now the second one, the much more controversial... *sigh* I don't even know how to begin. It's much more complicated and the nation is really divided on the issue. I feel the division personally, I have family and friends who are both for and against the Reproductive Health Bill (RH Bill) now called the Responsible parenthood bill. I am a little divided myself because I see the point of both ends and I feel the advantages and disadvantages and advantages of the bill. But the bottom line is, ultimately I am pro-choice and responsible parenthood, so yeah if I was a member of the congress or the senate, I would vote "YES" for the bill.

First of all, let me just say, I feel bad for those who are against the bill for valid and sensible reasons for they are represented by the likes of Sen. Tito Sotto who would not humble himself by admitting he plagiarized excerpts of a blog post and a speech of a late American president, and Sen. Juan Ponce Enrile who thinks the OFW is our best export that's why he's against RH Bill (which is the most stupid argument I've heard!!). Then there's the Catholic Bishop Conference of the Philippines (CBCP) and the priests, collectively known as "the Catholic Church". You see, I'm a little uncomfortable with that. I am not a devout, but I'm a practicing Catholic, I go to church every Sunday and on Holidays of obligation, I pray the Rosary and the 3 o'clock prayer, I join the annual Visita Iglesia of our parish and I consistently include the souls of the faithful departed in my prayers. But I disagree with the bishops and the Vatican on a lot of issues, a LOT of Catholics do and I get hurt when criticisms refer to "the Catholic Church" when bishops voice their political stand point, or when another clergy gets involved in a nauseating scandal like sex abuse. But I do not see myself leaving this faith in the near nor far future. I know for a fact that there are bishops and priest who gives a bad name to the Catholic sect, but then, every religion has that. So when people bash the religion itself, I get hurt.Not all Catholics are against RH Bill, and even those who are against it have fair reasons to oppose it. Like I said, it does comes with advantages, for one thing we are talking about budget here. Unlike the Sin Tax Law, which will generate its own budget, RH Bill will be taken from the existing budget that tax payers are now providing. Budget allotment is always a challenge because of the culture of corruption that the present administration pledge to abolish. I'm also not in favor of allocating budget to give free condoms and pills because I feel these two methods of contraception is affordable and accessible enough for everyone. If the so called mass have the money to buy cigarettes and alcohol, now that these products are about to get unaffordable, then they should be able to afford condoms and pills. I feel very strong about education though.  The bill aims to give people a choice, and true choice would only be realized with proper information. What would couples do with free pills and condoms when they don't know what it's for? Some of the issues of the people against the bill is the rise of promiscuity among the youth, with the integration of sex education and access to contraception. In a way, it does, but then, even without the bill, it's on the rise. It's kinda sad, but it's the reality. Sex is everywhere, in pop music, in movies, sitcoms, soaps, in video games, parlor games (I remember attending a party with naughty games and kids are there). In my (teenage) days, it's very unlikely for a prime time TV show to have a kissing scene, now it's very common to see an afternoon program showing a couple making out. I don't really blame the Censorship, the times are changing. It's best to handle it with versatility than keep on doing things the old way. Right now, I do feel that ignorance plays a big part on the rise of STDs, irresponsible parenthood and even the case of abortion. I think education is the best answer to combat these problems.

It's not about population control but responsible parenthood -- my aunt who's a midwife and works at our municipal health center told a story about a relative of ours who keeps on coming back in the center with a new (malnourished) child, my aunt told her it's time to stop getting pregnant, but she just smirked and replied "masarap eh" (feels good eh). One day, it was her husband who came to the center with one of the sick child and my aunt told her to start using condom. He just laughed. I have a lot of relatives like that. What do you do to these people?

I think the church, not just the Catholic church, but all legible group aiming to preserve our values should think of other ways to keep the people grounded rather than meddle in politics. Like I said earlier, there are many issues that put a bad name to my religion but I chose to stay. Why? Because it is the foundation of all  the values I held dear - my compassion on life, respect to my neighbor, love for my family, love for God.

With the passage of 2 controversial law, I think the country is on the right path. There are lots of monumental events in politics and I'm starting to see small improvements (EDSA is going green, yay). We've got reasons to think that 2013 will be promising.

Visita Iglesia 2012

Hey y'all, it's Holy Wednesday. Later on, there will be a procession around the town presenting the Passion of Christ. The observation of the Lenten season is big in our town. The next 3 days will be the most quiet ones in the year. One of the activities of our parish is the annual pilgrimage to 7 churches. I pledged to join since last year. This year, our pilgrim destination was the province of Cavite. We visited churches from the Diocese of Imus. My friend Nagi, who happened to be a homegrown of Cavite, joined our pilgrimage. Compared to last year, there were more pilgrims who joined this year. It's great that more people are getting involved in religious activities.

Our Lady of the Pillar, Imus Cavite

Our Lady of the Pillar Interior

Immaculate Concepcion Parish, Dasmarinas Cavite

Immaculate Concepcion Parish interior

Our Lady of La Salette Parish, Biga Cavite

Our Lady of La Salette parish interior

Our Lady of Knight Parish, Silang Cavite

Our Lady of Knight Parish interior

Ina ng Laging Saklolo (Our Lady of Perpetual Help) Parish, Tagaytay

Ina ng Laging Saklolo Parish interior

Our Lady of Lourdes Parish, Tagaytay

Our Lady of Lourdes Parish interior

We concluded our pilgrimage with a mass in our last church visit in St. Gregory the Great Parish in Indang, Cavite. 

St. Gregory the Great Parish

St. Gregory the Great parish interior

concluding the Stations of the Cross

When I selected the pictures to post, I suddenly realized I don't have much to say. Then I've had second thoughts whether I should blog about this or not. The whole pilgrimage was supposed to be a spiritual journey, but I gotta be honest, looking at what happened during the day, I feel like I failed my mission. I feel guilty, I feel like the whole pilgrimage itself had become more of an architectural and historical appreciation than an act of reflection and penance. I got distracted all the time, I laughed endlessly at the mishaps after mishaps I experienced while on the bus, I got critical of some disorderly proceedings of the pilgrimage and I barely listened to priest's homily.

Suddenly I am reminded just how flawed I am. Despite my honest desire to be a good disciple of Christ, I harbor ill thoughts towards other people. That's not to say I'm a wicked person wishing bad things for other people, no, but here's my dilemma -- when I am surrounded with complex and intellectual deep thinkers, I get intimated, but when I am surrounded with not so deep thinking people, I get extremely irritated. Irritated by stupid little things that radiate them, so I can't help but curse and trash those people, which is a bad waste of energy. I hate it when I hate, not a healthy feeling.


Everyday is a struggle to be a better person. This Lenten season, I reflect on all the awful things that I've done. Of course I know that God forgives, but it's not enough to just ask forgiveness, the act of repentance requires the commitment to correct the mistake, and I know that I say this on my everyday prayer, but I will try to be better. 


I hope y'all have a meaningful Holy Week.

Guess who's in my room?

Okay so that's the statue St. Ildefonsus of Toledo, our town's patron saint. Actually the statue had been in my room a couple of days ago. Barangay halls conduct mass every night in preparation for his feast, which was yesterday (Yes I posted late again). So while the statue was on rotation, I'm assuming parish officials decided to store it in our house, and my religious parents decided to store it temporarily in my room. Because, I am the most holy child in the house. No, my room seems to be the most secure. So for like 3 days, I had a room mate hehehe. How cool is that? :)

Visita Iglesia 2011

Last Saturday, I did something I haven't done before. I joined the annual Visita Iglesia organized by our local parish. It's a Catholic tradition where in pilgrims visit 7 churches during Lenten season to ask for penance. In each church, we relive 2 stations of the cross. The priest gives homily relating each station to remind us how Christ suffered to save us. How we should follow his way for the salvation of our souls.

Let me tell you something. I have never been so eager to join these type of religious activities. The past decade my life, I got caught up in my own world - studies, friends, anime, Japan, work, ambition, etc., I barely have time for God. When I had the time to spare, I use it to bum out. But don't get me wrong. I was never an atheist nor agnostic. I have always been a believer. I just wasn't a devout Christian. I still am not, I always tell myself that I have to do it on my own pace and there are principles of the church that I contest. But last year's series of unfortunate events prompted me to pause and reflect. When I was young, my mom often told me that tragedies or unfortunate things happen not because God is punishing us, but He is testing us, our faith. Trials. They also serve as reminders because when we are drowning with blessings, we forget to thank Him, we forget to follow His ways, we forget to ask forgiveness. The recent tragedy in Japan, is again, a reminder that something is greater than us, that in this type of situation, we have no choice but to leave everything to Him.

I am thankful that I got to realize that early enough to go back to the right path before I get lost completely. I still have a long way to go, but with God's grace, I know I will make it in time.

So we visited 7 churches in the province of Pampanga. Most of them as old as our church here in Tanay and I couldn't help thinking that there must have been some kind of standard on building churches in 1600s, because they resemble one another. There's always relief sculptures of the 14 stations of the cross on both ends of the nave, there are portraits of the four evangelists (Mark, Matthew, Luke, and Thomas) on the dome ceiling, the choir loft sits just above the main entrance (which I doubt is being used by the choir nowadays). Not every church has pulpit though. As I look at these old buildings, I can't help wishing I paid more attention on Arts History. It's amazing how these buildings survived for centuries. They were built at a time when there was raw technology. A stark reminder that machines can never replace the workmanship of humans.

Sta. Rita de Cascia Parish in Sta. Rita, Pampanga

Interior of Sta. Rita Parish

St. Augustine Parish in Lubao Pampanga

Interior of St. Augustine Parish, it is currently undergoing restoration

Immaculate Concepcion Parish in Guagua, Pampanga

Interior of Immaculate Concepcion Parish

My favorite church would have to be the St. James parish in Betis, Pampanga. It has a simple facade outside but once you go inside, it has the most intricate interior of all the churches I've ever seen. It has a wooden floor too, which makes it really unique. The guard on duty (another special feature hahaha, you don't normally see a guard in a church) warned us at the onset of our arrival that we have to turn off the flash of our cameras when taking picture. The place is packed with mural paintings all over, the people there seems to be serious in maintaining the beauty of their church. Whether some people are hard headed or plain ignorant on how to change the settings of their cameras (most of the pilgrims are old people), the guard got really stressed out in reprimanding people who failed to turn off the flash and it was really amusing to watch him hehehe.

St. James Paris in Betis, Pampanga

the pulpit is the stand where friars used to conduct their sermon

awww the poor Manong Guard, his BP went up for sure

Kidd in front of the altar

I am mostly proud of the San Guillermo Parish in Bacolor, Pampanga. It stood still despite being situated in one of the most devastated area when Mt. Pinatubo erupted. The place got half buried by lahar, They apparently had to tore the orginal ceilings because the ground got elevated so high. I also learned that this is the church where a popular TV series was shoot. I didn't watch it but the main character's name is Santino, I kept hearing the people say his name while we were on this place.

San Guillermo Parish in Bacolor, Pampanga

Interior of San Guillermo Parish

what used to be the windows up above is now down below, just like life...

the interior of the church before the 1991 eruption of Mt. Pinatubo

The Adoration Chapel requires you to duck before you can enter because of the elevated ground

St. Peter the Apostle Parish in Apalit, Pampanga

Interior of St. Peter the Apostle Parish

Immaculate Concepcion Parish, San Fernando Pampanga

Interior of Immaculate Concepcion Parish

We ended our pilgrimage with a mass in Immaculate Concepcion Parish in San Fernando. Now here's a tradition that I do not know if it's widely practiced. A friend told me once, that if it's you're first time hearing mass on another church, you could make a wish, guaranteed to come true. There's also that common practice of lighting a candle for your petition. Now I think that prayers will work, even if I do it in my room, but lighting a candle for a good cause won't take anything from me, so I went and got me a set of 4 candles anyway. In this parish, they even make a color coding for wishes. I only knew white candles in Baclaran church *scratch head*.

I played along anyway and chose the colors according to my personal intentions.

This whole pilgrimage is a brand new, learning and healing experience. I just realized that we have a new parish director, I don't know his name but I think I like him. The way he discuss the 14 stations of the cross, relating it to our present lives, and how he led this whole activity, I feel that our parish is in good hands. My only complaint is the bus driver, but I'm not gonna talk about him. I would just like to forgive him and pray that he becomes a better person, leaving him to God hehehe.